Midget football 101
- Thread starter hickslawns
- Start date
Honestly? I don't have time to type it all up. I will do so though, because it will probably be good to clear my mind and get back to work with a fresh attitude: MIL holds a "Grandma's Camp" at Indian Lake every summer for a few days. Geoffrey was told he could go down with Erin and the kids, play awhile, and come back for football tonight. He melted down and reverted to 3-5yr old behaviors. I took everything away from him he could possibly destroy. I made him sit in the corner on the hardwood floors until he calmed down. I even videoed him to show him later how silly he looked. Erin left. I had had enough. Told him when I come back in the house he has two choices: Calm himself down, or get a spanking he wouldn't forget. I gathered papers for invoicing customers for July from all the trucks, jumped on the tractor and moved some stuff around which needed to be done, and came back in. He was calm. We had a civil chat. He knows my expectations tonight. He knows my expectations the rest of the season. Time will tell.
The thing I need to keep reminding myself is his intellectual, academic, social and maturity levels are all that of about a child half his age. We have read where often times children stop progressing around the age abuse begins. Makes sense when you see him act like a 4-5 year old. Physically he wears a men's size 10 shoe, is 5'1 or 5'2", and 90-95lbs. Mentally and socially he is probably 4-7yrs old. Academically he is roughly at a third grade level. Erin and I think he still sees himself as about a 7-8yr old but doesn't realize he is physically an 11-12yr old.
We will MAKE him go to practice. We will continue to chat with him about choices. It is a daily occurrence. Abuse/neglect from (guessing) 4-5yrs old to 9-10yrs old has certainly stunted his development. Counselor has told us this does NOT have to be permanent, but do not expect him to make huge leaps at a time. Between us and his biological parents there were 3 different foster homes. The kid has minimal trust for adults. Most adults have let him down (in his eyes) during his life. We are hoping the interaction with peers his age in an environment outside the special "Alternative Behavioral School" he attends is a motivational tool to make him want to get his act together to be eligible for enrollment back into "normal" public schools. Football? He will be there. Will he participate? His choice. Will he play? Dependent upon his attitude, training, work ethic, and improvement. Time will tell.
I know much of this sounds "mambi pambi" or "babying him" or some of you say "I could not do it" or "You are more patient than I would be". I don't buy it. I had the same thoughts prior to this. Being around him and realizing you are building a foundation from a pile of broken blocks gives you a different perspective. Your opinion changes as you learn the behaviors, the triggers, and what is effective or not. I am not looking for any pats on the back. I honestly feel the majority of you would do the same thing if put in this situation. It is very difficult to describe from the inside to those only hearing me bellyache about the set backs. It has not all been negative. After all, last weekend he rode the dirt bike for the first time. That is something he had to earn. That was a big accomplishment. Milo saw him in action as well. He can be a lovable and happy kid. Shooting the bow with my 8yr old at Milo's was a good day. Then again, Geoffrey was playing with someone 3-4yrs younger than him. Garrett is closer to Geoffrey's social level. They play well together. Sometimes it is tough to remember he is a young, immature child, in a bigger child's body.
Wow Phil. Words cant honestly be spoken or typed to describe the amount of good and love you and your family are providing him. All I can say is he's lucky to have you guys. I hope in the long run he develops enough to see that
Buckmaster
Senior Member
No. You would drink my beer, pillage my fridge, and weasel in on my hunting spots.:smiley_crocodile:
I hope you are right Ben. If he is damaged beyond repair and we cannot make a difference in his life, I will at least be able to look back and say "I gave it my all."
Thanks Ryan. I appreciate it. The bold line is our main hope as well. Like I said though, I am not looking for an extra star on my chart or a pat on the back. If you or your wife had a nephew in a similar situation I am sure you would try your best to figure out a way to help him. We honestly rejected the requests from Children's Services several times to take him in. It was not until they confirmed his parents would NEVER have a chance to regain custody that we took him in. We couldn't find it in our hearts to bring him in if there was a chance of him going back to the shithole he was living in. Once this possibility was removed it still took a TON of soul searching before reluctantly bringing him in. We are not Saints. We were simply in a fortunate position in our lives to be able to take him in. It was a very difficult decision. In the end though, it was either us or a group home. We couldn't let that happen.
For what it is worth, he went to practice tonight. I asked him if he thought he should say anything to his coaches. He said "Yes." I asked what he should say to them. He said "Sorry and I will work hard for them." He did so, then went on to practice the entire night. Didn't give up despite getting rocked nearly every play. The boy needs to learn to stay low and hit hard. It will come to him sooner or later. Either that or we are going to need to buy some extra Shout for the grass stains on the back of his uniform. lol
That's great news that he did that. He'll get the hang of it. I got a feeling one of these times he'll rock another kid and see how good it felt and then it'll be on.
Red- I haven't had pads on since my sophmore year in high school (1991). I still remember that feeling! Not sure the sound of a good crack of the pads is something you forget!
Huckleberry Finn
Senior Member
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What position is this?
Stay low....and it's all about footwork...that's coming from a non-aggressive guy.
Also, the drill with the pipes sucks. I HATED that...but you get your nogging knocked around a few times and you learn
Stay low....and it's all about footwork...that's coming from a non-aggressive guy.
Also, the drill with the pipes sucks. I HATED that...but you get your nogging knocked around a few times and you learn
Lineman. Didn't hear how practice went last night. Wednesday he worked hard. I was not a lineman, but I knew how to stay low and use good technique. Technique and discipline can go a long way.
Huckleberry Finn
Senior Member
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It's all footwork then. He's got goofy arms but he'll grow into them. I did, by my senior year haha. I wasn't an all-Ohio player but I learned that with long arms and legs, if I stayed low in a good stance, I could just run with anyone on pass blocks (I played backside tackle several years). I think if I had started at tackle I would have been better but played guard for several of the beginning years. You don't need to be the biggest or strongest lineman if you NEVER stop moving your feet.
Thanks for the input Huck. I will keep working with him on this.
I talked to him today when I got home from the show. He said he worked hard at Thursday's practice. Glad he had a couple good days.
I talked to him today when I got home from the show. He said he worked hard at Thursday's practice. Glad he had a couple good days.