I agree 100% on the whole life. Pay whatever you can afford. If it is one less trip to BW3/month for you, then you do it. Seriously. $20-25/mo will lock her into a policy at the cheapest rate she will ever be able to buy it again. I want to say $25/mo got us around $50k in life insurance or maybe it was $25k. Dang I forget now. Hope I never find out either.
I believe there are only 2-3 reasons it can be drawn on (without penalty). 1) College. 2) First home purchase. 3) Financial Hardship
Northwestern Mutual Life Insurance is the only way to go when it comes to this one.
Wish I could help you on the college plan. My kids can figure it out on their own. That is what my wife and I had to do. I have watched way too many kids piss away their parent's money smokin/jokin/drinkin their way straight to the status of "college dropout". If our kids "happen" to get their college paid off as a graduation present, then good for them. While they are in school though, they are on their own. They need to learn how to swim on their own. (In all fairness, my wife doesn't share these feelings. lol)