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Don't bury your dead cats in the mulch

hickslawns

Dignitary Member
Supporting Member
35,284
191
NW Ohio
Just got a phone call from one of my employees out sweeping parking lots tonight.

Driver: There is a white cat in the mulch at one of our accounts.
Me: So. . .
Driver: It is dead.
Me: Oh.
Driver: Someone tried to bury it.
Me: Okaaay. . .
Driver: Well, it is white. . . and . . .ahhh . . .they didn't do a very good job.
Me: Okay.
Driver: Will you be in the area tomorrow at all?
Me: I don't know.
Driver: If you are, umm. . . maybe you should bring a pitchfork or something.
Me: What for?
Driver: The cat.
Me: What for?
Driver: To pick it up.
Me: Just throw it in the hopper.
Driver: Ummm. . . okay. . . I guess I can do that.
Me: Is it stiff?
Driver: I don't know yet.
Me: Well if it is nasty or something just let me know and I will scoop it up tomorrow. Otherwise just throw it in there.
Driver: (After a bit of a pause) ok.
Me: Thank you. You can now add that to the list of nasty stuff you have picked up while sweeping parking lots.
Driver: hahahahahahaha, Yeah, hahahahaha.

I tell you this as a remind people "Spay and neuter your pets." Bob Barker would.

I could write a book about crazy stuff witnessed while sweeping parking lots. I swear people would either love it or call me a liar. There are some crazy people out there, but I haven't had anyone bury any pets in shallow graves in my fresh mulch before now. Dang.
 

RedCloud

Super Moderator
Super Mod
16,832
149
Somewhere OHIO
HAHAHAHA lmao

That is funny. I bet you have seen a few things over the years lol. Would be fun to hear next to a camp fire sometime.
 

Huckleberry Finn

Senior Member
15,973
124
Hahaha, they spread mulch here today and damn it if that triple ground regular didn't smell pretty damn good! I almost grabbed a shovel and started spreading myself. Love that stuff.

And the manure. Apparently the best way to grow grass is to dump a ton of manure right on top of the existing, weak grass and that makes it pop up...wth...

Never found a dead cat in the mulch, but the dogs on the Farm used to bury their bones and dog treats in the mulch pits. I'd be loading someone with the bobcat and catch a glimpse of a milkbone going into the back of their pickup lol - no extra charge!
 

CJD3

Dignitary Member
Supporting Member
13,062
155
NE Ohio
Probably some " little old lady" type.

Wasen't at the local walmart was it. Gotta love the Walmart people. :smiley_crocodile:
 

hickslawns

Dignitary Member
Supporting Member
35,284
191
NW Ohio
I just open the front door and Brutus runs them off or up a tree. I have nothing against cats, they just make me sneeze. Therefore, I have nothing for cats.

Chalk it up with another interesting "Adventures in Parking Lot Sweeping". SHould this be a chapter in my memoirs someday, or should I do a mini-book with just sweeping stories? Hmmm. . . might have to wait and see how much material I come up with. lol
 

Beentown

Dignitary Member
Supporting Member
15,754
131
Sunbury, OH
Phil I completely understand. I have some accounts that are apartment complexes around/near the hood. Today I go into a 2 bedroom unit for a complete paint and there was literal shit all over the place. I called the manager and had him meet me there and he thought I was kidding when I said shit was everywhere.

Fine, on to the next unit. It was a full paint but it was occupied. We opened the door and a 5 person bong was in the middle of the floor and sparrows were flying around the room...ugh.

Beentown
 

hickslawns

Dignitary Member
Supporting Member
35,284
191
NW Ohio
Still better than unemployment isn't it Beener? Oh what things we do in the name of self employment. hahaha