Why do OSU grads hang their diplomas from their rear view mirrors?
So they can park in the handicapped spaces.
An OSU alum and a UM alum are standing next to each other in the men's room. The UM grad finishes first and heads for the door. The OSU grad says, "At the Ohio State University, they teach us to wash our hands after we use the bathroom."
Unimpressed, the UM alum says, "At the University of Michigan, they teach us not to piss on our hands."
What is 100 yards long and has around 200 teeth?
The front row at Ohio Stadium.
Buckeye walks into the Varsity Club the night before The Game and says to the Bartender, “I’m feeling good about tomorrow and I want a beer – but nothing from St. Louis or Milwaukee.”
Bartender says, “Between you and me and the bar stool, the best beer I got in the house is a smooth pale lager – smuggled in from across the border.” Then he whispers, “It’s Wolverine Beer. Wanna try it?”
Buckeye immediately goes livid. “You’re outta your mind! Last time I tipped back a Wolverine I couldn’t stop till the tenth one. Then I went home blew chunks!”
Bartender says, “Dude, you put back ten of anything and you’re gonna feel wrong.”
Buckeye says, “You don’t understand. Chunks is my Rottweiler.”
Q: How do you make Ohio State cookies?
A: Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.
Q: Why do OSU students wear hats all the time?
A: So they know which end to wipe.
Q: What's the difference between Ohio State's football stadium and a porcupine?
A: With the stadium, all the pricks are on the inside.
For Joe
How do you keep Ohio State's football team off your lawn?
Paint it to look like an SEC endzone.
OH........IO
OH........IO
WE ARE........SO SMART
WE CAN........SPELL STUFF
IF WE ........WORK TOGETHER
OH........IO
OH........IO
And the reason I am not a fan of OSU Athletics....besides the fans
Q: Why did Woody Hayes leave Michigan Stadium early?
A: So he could beat the crowd.