1. "OLD" IS WHEN..... Your wife says, "Let's go upstairs and
make love," and you answer, "Honey, I can't do both!"
2. "OLD" IS WHEN..... Your friends compliment you on your new
alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
3. "OLD" IS WHEN..... A sexy babe catches your fancy and your
pacemaker opens the garage door.
4. "OLD" IS WHEN..... Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of
your face.
5. "OLD" IS WHEN..... You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
6. "OLD" IS WHEN..... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
7. "OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting a little action" means I don't need
to take any fibre today.
8. "OLD" IS WHEN..... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in
the car park.
9. "OLD" IS WHEN..... An "all-nighter" means not getting up to
pee!