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The man test.


*Supporting Member*
Mahoning Co.
1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:

A. Lovemaking
B. Screwing
C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town

2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared:

A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship
B. Your blood-test results
C. Five tequila slammers

3. You time your orgasm so that:

A. Your partner climaxes first
B. You both climax simultaneously
C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center

4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:

A. Healthy, creative love-play
B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to
C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about.

5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:

A. The best part of the experience
B. The second best part of the experience
C. $100 extra

6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:

A. of no influence on your affection for her
B. Not a problem, she can join your gym
C. A conservative estimate

7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:

A. A myth
B. An oxymoron
C. A moron

8. Foreplay is to sex as:

A. an appetizer is to an entree
B. primer is to paint.
C. a long line is to an amusement park ride

9. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:

A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy
B. Is uptight and a waste of time
C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place

Evaluating Results:

If you answered "A" more than 7 times: Ask your wife for annual visitation rights to your balls.

If you answered "B" more than 7 times: Check into therapy - you're more than just a little confused.

If you answered "C" more than 7 times: YOU DA MAN!

DJK Frank 16

Senior Member
Supporting Member
Hardin County
LOL... If you've answered "C" more than 7 times you probably don't have a set of balls anymore... more than likely you've been castrated by your wife! haha