Last names.
- Thread starter Jackalope
- Start date
Good question Joe, I'd like too see the responses..... Me personally, my wife joked about it back when we married and I basically said if you can't commit too the name I guess it carries over too the marriage as well lol.... I was kind of an asshole in my youth lol..... In these days a lot of folks are foregoing the marriage and just cohabiting, regardless of the kids or not..... I've changed over the years and I don't think it would honestly bother me either way....
I can see if someone was a professional and had built up a reputation with their name and then wanting to not lose that identity, where in changing their name would/could jeopardize their career too a point....
What's your take on the changing the name?
I can see if someone was a professional and had built up a reputation with their name and then wanting to not lose that identity, where in changing their name would/could jeopardize their career too a point....
What's your take on the changing the name?
huntn2
Senior Member
My take is the name should change and not be hyphenated. My stance is as J was at one time....perhaps one day I too will change but to me it was commitment...
Hortontoter
Senior Member
I somewhat agree with J. A professional, with a career, may need the name as an asset. But, if my name isn't good enough, I'd feel I'm not good enough either.
I can see where some may want to change their name back after a divorce though.
I can see where some may want to change their name back after a divorce though.
My fiance is going to hyphenate her name because of her nursing career. I'd rather she just have my last name, but I understand why she wants it like that. She's built up a good reputation in her career over the years.
I think they should take your name and be happy with it...but im old school when it comes to that.
I'm in the camp of "them changing their name" unless it would effect their livelihood like J said earlier.
There is actually a black male in his 60's at my work that took his wife's last name!!! WTF is up wit dat!?!? Lol
There is actually a black male in his 60's at my work that took his wife's last name!!! WTF is up wit dat!?!? Lol
I'll be 100% honest. If I see a woman with a hyphenated name that isn't doing it because she was born into a famous family where the name is an asset, my first thought is "pretentious cunt". Can't help it. I went to a liberal arts college, so my sample set of women who make that conscious decision is skewed. I watched a professor at a college graduation ceremony with a hyphenated last name, emasculate her husband on stage in front of thousands of people. He was a professor there too.
A good woman loves her man enough to take his name. I'm progressive in a lot of my thinking, but I believe 100% in this despite it being very old school. Not sure I can really point to any one reason as to why either. My wife and I have had this very same conversation and she thinks it it is cunty TOO. Again, her sample set (and opinion) is largely skewed through college and being around me for the last 11 years.
That said, I understand why some people want to do this and I think they should have every right to do so. No doubt there are some exceptional women out there with hyphenated last name; like Chad's soon to be wife. My wife is a nurse as well, however we married 3 months after she started, so there was no need to do it professionally. With her having a good reputation now prior to marrying Chad, that is smart move on her part in some regards.
All in all, my first take on a hyphenated name is not good. However I've matured to the point that I at least give the person a chance to prove to me that this choice doesn't necessarily reflect on their entire nature.
A good woman loves her man enough to take his name. I'm progressive in a lot of my thinking, but I believe 100% in this despite it being very old school. Not sure I can really point to any one reason as to why either. My wife and I have had this very same conversation and she thinks it it is cunty TOO. Again, her sample set (and opinion) is largely skewed through college and being around me for the last 11 years.
That said, I understand why some people want to do this and I think they should have every right to do so. No doubt there are some exceptional women out there with hyphenated last name; like Chad's soon to be wife. My wife is a nurse as well, however we married 3 months after she started, so there was no need to do it professionally. With her having a good reputation now prior to marrying Chad, that is smart move on her part in some regards.
All in all, my first take on a hyphenated name is not good. However I've matured to the point that I at least give the person a chance to prove to me that this choice doesn't necessarily reflect on their entire nature.
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I am with "young J" and huntn2. It is a commitment. Marriage is for the long haul. There is no turning around. I (personally) leave few options for leaving a marriage. Physical abuse, infidelity, extreme verbal abuse. . . it better be a darn good reason to end a marriage. For this reason, the name changes.
No offense Chad, but my idea of a career in which changing the last name would affect someone isn't nursing. I think of TV personalities, political figures and similar positions when it comes to keeping the last name or hyphenating. I don't claim to be any sort of expert on the subject. Just my opinion.
No offense Chad, but my idea of a career in which changing the last name would affect someone isn't nursing. I think of TV personalities, political figures and similar positions when it comes to keeping the last name or hyphenating. I don't claim to be any sort of expert on the subject. Just my opinion.
Schu72
Well-Known Member
I agree with most everything posted so far. I would have been somewhat offended if it had even been suggested when my wife and I married 15 years ago. The only exception I could see would have been where name recognition would have impacted earning potential....nursing would not pass ( wife and I both have nursing degrees and met in nursing school). Doctor, lawyer, dentist....something where you have cultivated a practice or following where name recognition is important would get a pass.
The woman should take the husbands last name. That is part of the ceremony and commitment. I would also say it should be done so that it isn't a pain in the ass for legal papers and insurance purposes.
Ric, that guy at work should have his man card revoked and his nuts cut off lol.
Ric, that guy at work should have his man card revoked and his nuts cut off lol.
I'm with the masses on the wife taking the husbands last time, never really thought of it any other way though. My wife and I are both old school in most of our thoughts and beliefs, so it was never really a question with us.
Big_Holla
Senior Member
My take on it is if they are either famous or have some sort of business/professional reason to keep the name hyphenated then they should. If not then IMO they should take on their husbands name.
Archertl
Senior Member
I talked jessie into changing her name because it really bugs me when there are two last names on the mailing address. Plus I think that since you are being married and becoming one family there should be one name. Unfortunately it is traditionally the woman that has to change their name. So if she is a femininist type she is probably going to be against it.
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Milo
Tatonka guide.
- 8,189
- 171
not really....women, once they get married have a lot of power...i mean they control half the money and ALL the booty
rgecko23
*Supporting Member*
rgecko23
*Supporting Member*
hahahahahahaha thats the ultimate you have no balls moment if you ask me. Unless your family is so white trash that you dont want anything to do with them or be associated with them in any way.