See the black panel? You gotta take that off to change the oil. Break-in period was over on the new mower and I wasn't real sure how to take it off.
Well, see the dog shit on the tire? When that panel "popped" off...it flicked a chunk of mother fucking dog shit IN my mother fucking mouth!
I went into full body convulsions in the yard for a while before crawling into the house to wash my face and teeth. As I laid in the yard surrounded in my own puke, not being able to breath, holding my balls from the pin of dry heaving, I seriously thought "isn't this a grand way to die". Front page of the tabloid for this guy.